Man Up, Men

I’m so proud of my step-daughter, Emily. She fights to overcome obstacles, works hard for good grades, and loves Jesus. She is now at that distressing part of her life (maybe more for me than her) where she is learning about relationships with boys. This is her latest obstacle as the selection of boys who possess promising futures of actually becoming strong Christian men is quite limited.

The sad part is that her prospects probably won’t improve anytime soon, as more and more young men are failing to actually grow up into respectful and respected men.

I've recently realized I don’t only want Emily to be successful in school and college just so she can be well-balanced in her education and confidence, but because she may not be able to find a Christian man with enough ambition and maturity to commit himself to raising a family.

William J. Bennett, a CNN contributor, notes, “For the first time in history, women are better educated, more ambitious and arguably more successful than men. . . . Today, 18-to- 34-year-old men spend more time playing video games a day than 12-to- 17-year-old boys. While women are graduating college and finding good jobs, too many men are not going to work, not getting married and not raising families.”

I suspect there are probably more young men who would like to become mature men, but simply lack any real guidance. Television certainly isn’t any help as men are portrayed as obsessing over sex, discarding relationships with women when they become challenging, and never taking responsibility to grow into manhood, commit to marriage, and lead a family.

Now I don’t believe all men need to be Sunday School teachers and corporate executives with six figure salaries. I suspect most young Christian women simply want a man that truly loves Jesus, and has his head screwed on straight.

Kevin DeYoung, Senior Pastor at University Reformed Church in East Lansing, Michigan put it like this, “They just want a guy with some substance. A guy with plans. A guy with some intellectual depth. A guy who can winsomely take initiative and lead a conversation. A guy with consistency. A guy who no longer works at his play and plays with his faith. A guy with a little desire to succeed in life. A guy they can imagine providing for a family, praying with the kids at bedtime, mowing the lawn on Saturday, and being eager to take everyone to church on Sunday.”

Young women shouldn’t settle for anything less than a solid Christian commitment in a husband. Young men need to get serious about their faith, stop going in circles, and find a dose of godly ambition.

1 Corinthians 16:13 (NASB) “Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.”

Real Men

I like knives, guns and action movies.  Am I not a real man?  I like chrome, horsepower and racing stripes.  Does that make me a real man?  I like my own opinion, things the way they are, and feeling superior to others.  Surely this makes me a real man.

By observing many men today, it would appear that all it takes to be a real man is to just do what comes naturally.  Things like drinking lots of beer, neglecting loving wives, and by reminding ungrateful kids at every commercial just how hard they work.  Things like weekly fishing trips, ridiculous purchases, and emotional shallowness.  Things like being too proud to admit being wrong, too insecure to accept correction, and too easily distracted by things that are just not important.

One of my favorite verses is Proverbs 27:17 "Iron sharpens iron, So one man sharpens another." 

From what I've read, the best way to sharpen a knife is to use steel.  When using a mere stone, the blade can become rough and out of line.  But by using a sharpening steel, the blade will be smoothed out, leaving a nice straight edge.

The same way a sharpening steel will straighten out a blade's edge, a good man can straighten out another good man.  But the truth is most men don't like being challenged by other men.  As a result, they never acquire a sharper, straighter edge; therefore they are less effective, less useful, less equipped for that which they were created.

Might I submit to you that a real man is one who recognizes the value of being challenged by other men, recognizes the value of having his edge straightened out, and recognizes that a real man is one who is continually forged in the crucible of steel-on-steel training and honing and straightening.  A real man recognizes the value of other men, and rather than avoiding their challenge, he welcomes it.